Differences of Opinion

By Wendy Cope

1.  HE TELLS HER

He tells her that the earth is flat -
He knows the facts, and that is that.
In altercations fierce and long
She tries her best to prove him wrong.
But he has learned to argue well
He calls her arguments unsound
And often asks her not to yell.
She cannot win. He stands his ground.

The earth goes on being round.

2. YOUR MOTHER KNOWS

Your mother knows the earth's a plane,
And, challenged, shed's a martyr's tear.
God give her strengths the bear this pain -
A child who says the earth's a sphere.

Challenged, she shed's a martyr's tear
It's bad to make your mother cry.
By telling her the world's a sphere
It's very bad to tell a lie.

It's bad to make your mother cry
It's bad to think your mother odd
It's very bad to tell a lie.
All this has been ordained by God.

It's very bad to think your mother odd
The world is round. That's also true.
All this has been ordained by God.
It's hard to see what you can do.

The world is round. That must be true.
She's praying, hoping you will change.
It's hard to see what you can do.
Already people find you strange.

She's praying, hoping you will change.
You're difficult, you don't fit in.
Already people find you strange.
You know your anger is a sin.

You're difficult, you don't fit in.
God give her strength to bear this pain.
You know your anger is a sin.
Your mother knows the earth's a plane.