May Day

By Phillis Levin

I've decided to waste my life again,
Like I used to: get drunk on
The light in the leaves, find a wall

Against which something can happen,
Whatever may have happened
Long ago—let a bullet hole echoing

The will of an executioner, a crevice
 In which a love note was hidden,
Be a cell where a struggling tendril

Utters a few spare syllables at dawn.
I've decided to waste my life
In a new way, to forget whoever

Touched a hair on my head, because
It doesn't matter what came to pass,
Only that it passed, because we repeat
Ourselves, we repeat ourselves.

I've decided to walk a long way
Out of the way, to allow something
Dreaded to waken for no good reason,

Let it go without saying,
Let it go as it will to the place
It will go without saying: a wall

Against which a body was pressed
For no good reason, other than this.